Kim and I have gotten into an occasional practice of asking each other what was the “high point” of our day. I think we first saw this in a movie, years ago, and then Genne´’s ex-husband would ask at the dinner table. He would also ask about “low points,” but we tend not to do that.
I thought it would be educational to share with you some of my “high points” over the years.
· One morning I successfully opened a package of bacon without using scissors. It took a while. [Time for a joke: An old guy goes into a sperm donor clinic, argues that he has a degree from Amherst, a Ph.D. from Harvard, and a Nobel Prize, so his sperm is worth collecting, despite his age. They give him a jar and send him to the bathroom to collect a sample. Half an hour later he emerges, looking very frustrated. “I tried everything! I put hot water on it, and cold water on it! I squeezed it! I even beat it against the sink! But I could not get the lid off the jar!”]
· I noticed when I was typing that my “w” key would not work unless I pounded on it. I imagined what it would take to get it fixed, and whether I might need a new computer. Then I slipped a fingernail under the key, and the problem was fixed. Made my day.
· I successfully reattached a wheel to our barbecue grill by properly inserting a cotter pin. This may seem to be a small victory to some of you.
· Eating Kim’s scones is often a high point.
· The other day we saw some mushrooms just off our back porch that looked like erect penises (not mine!). They are called “Devil’s Dipstick,” among other things. We learned that Victorian ladies would find them in the woods and destroy them because they looked evil. (Maybe they felt tempted . . ..) Here’s a photo.
Kim, for some reason, was more excited by these than I was.
· I spent $10 to buy lottery tickets and won $5. I felt good about this.
· Kim whispered something in my ear. I don’t remember what it was. Doesn’t matter.
· We watched a team of guys take down a huge poplar tree right next to a neighbor’s house. They were amazing with ropes, saws and pulleys. It’s great to witness such skills at work.
· When we hugged, we scratched each other’s back.
· Getting up every morning, still alive, and seeing this beautiful place where we live: the lake, the sunrise, the woods, the birds . . ..
· Sometimes a response to my blog is a high point. Not that I’m asking . . ..
· A guy came over to change the filters on our reverse osmosis system. He was soaking wet, as his previous stop had him dealing with a large machine outside in the rain. Kim told him to take off his shirt and undershirt, and she would put them in the dryer. He didn’t believe the offer, but after we insisted, he stripped down and completed the job in the kitchen bare-chested, as we chatted with him. The whole time he was saying, “I don’t believe this,” and “This makes my day.” My response: “That’s my wife.” His enthusiastic incredulity made this a high point for us.
A smart person now could stand back and draw some conclusions about the kind of person that would list things like these as “high points.” I am not the person to do this.